Whether you stay or go someday the darkness will clear, the voices will be silent, and it will just be you and whatever it is your doing at that moment, and it will feel great. And it might happen next week, tomorrow or 5 minutes from now or even right now.
Still waiting for this moment where the cloudy darkness disappears…for good, or at least for a decent duration. Every once in a while I have little moments that provide the illusion that I’ve finally arrived there, but they never feel welcome enough to make themselves at home.
In the meantime I’m left vulnerable; a captive to my thoughts.
I never realized how painful this time period was going to be.